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Betrayal Trigger Management and the TARR Approach - By Advanced Gottman Clinical Trainer & Consultant John Flanagan
18 February 2025 /
The reprocessing of relationship events, incidences, and issues that have created hurt, trauma, sadness, and grief is a long-term process that is not necessarily completed at the end of therapy - regardless of how emotionally corrective the therapy may have been. Our minds and bodies do not simply or completely move on. Traumatic memories, pain, and fear linger cognitively and somatically, resurfacing at unexpected times. When these triggers arise, a re-experiencing of the event or pain can occur, catapulting the partner back into strong emotions such as feeling unsafe, angry, and hurt. For couples, this can be a very difficult and confusing experience, especially when they believe the hurt has already been processed in therapy. It is crucial to recognise that these experiences are a normal and important stage of healing, and how the couple responds to these triggers is critical to their continued recovery.
The Anger, Resentment and Forgiveness Triad by Advanced Gottman Clinical Trainer & Consultant - Trish Purnell-Webb
30 January 2025 /
In one of our supervision groups recently, a clinician discussed a case in which some behaviour during the early years of the couple’s relationship had been less than respectful or desirable. The couple had discussed this many times, had sought therapy and had managed to stay together. However, fifteen years later, the offended partner, who was now in individual therapy, was finding themself ‘full of anger’. They acknowledged that the behaviour had stopped, and they believed their partner understood how the behaviour had been offensive and the hurt it had incurred, and yet they were still ‘seething with anger below the surface.’ One of the client’s goals for couple therapy was ‘to let go of the anger’.
How do we ‘let go’ of Anger?
Transform your practice with Gottman Method Couple Therapy Level 1 Training
20 January 2025 / For therapists / Gottman Marital Therapy
Are you a mental health professional, counsellor, or relationship coach dedicated to supporting couples in building stronger, healthier relationships? Couples therapy requires specific training that differs from individual (solo) therapy due to its focus on the dynamics between two individuals in a relationship rather than the experiences and needs of one person. Gottman Level 1 Training provides a thoughtful, research-based approach to relationship therapy, offering tools to help couples navigate challenges and conflict, improve communication, and deepen their connection.
What is Gottman Level 1 Training?
This foundational training introduces the Gottman Method, a science-based framework for strengthening relationships. Developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman over 45 years of research, the method equips you with practical skills to assess, understand, and address a wide range of couple dynamics - including communication issues, constant arguing. conflict resolution, trust issues, infidelity, life transitions, financial stressors, parenting challenges, emotional and physical disconnection, and past and present trauma.
Why Train with Relationship Institute Australasia?
6 January 2025 /
Why Train with Relationship Institute Australasia?
RIA (Relationship Institute Australasia) is a well-established organisation specialising in relationship therapy training & offering comprehensive Gottman Method Couples Therapy programs for professionals. With a proven track record of excellence, RIA has delivered over 90 Gottman training programs and trained more than 2,500 professionals across Australia, New Zealand, Hong Kong, and the USA.
From your first steps from Level 1 through to Certification, RIA supports your entire professional development journey. We offer all three levels of Gottman training, as well as supervision and consultation services, to help you become a Certified Gottman Therapist.
Expertise You Can Rely On
Globally, there are only 32 Advanced Clinical Trainers and Consultants in Gottman Therapy—a highly skilled group of professionals who lead training programs worldwide. RIA is proud to count John Flanagan and Trish Purnell-Webb among its team of trainers.
What is Gottman Marathon Relationship Therapy by Advanced Gottman Clinical Trainer & Consultant John Flanagan
18 December 2024 /
Gottman Marathon Relationship Therapy is an immersive, evidence-based approach to relationship counselling developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman. This unique format condenses months of traditional weekly therapy sessions into an extended intensive experience, typically spanning two consecutive days. It is designed to provide couples with focused, personalised support to address their specific relationship issues, downregulate negativity, build connection and friendship, and create a stronger sense of shared meaning, goals, and future.
Gottman Relationship Therapy is growing in popularity, internationally and here in Australia, and there are very good reasons for this. It is one of, if not the most, research-based methodologies for couples therapy.
The Role of Vagus Tone in Dysregulation: Understanding and Enhancing Emotional Well-Being - By Advanced Gottman Clinical Trainer & Consultant Trish Purnell-Webb
3 December 2024 /
The Role of Vagus Tone in Dysregulation: Understanding and Enhancing Emotional Well-Being
Emotional regulation is a critical aspect of mental health and interpersonal relationships. When individuals experience emotional dysregulation, it can lead to a host of challenges, both personally and in their interactions with others. One fascinating area of research that sheds light on emotional regulation looks at the vagus nerve and its influence on vagal tone.
What is Vagal Tone?
The vagus nerve, one of the longest cranial nerves in the body, plays a crucial role in the autonomic nervous system, which regulates involuntary bodily functions. Vagal tone refers to the activity of the vagus nerve and is often measured by heart rate variability (HRV). A higher vagal tone is associated with better emotional regulation, greater resilience, and a more robust ability to cope with stress. Conversely, low vagal tone can be linked to emotional dysregulation, anxiety, and other mental health challenges.
The Connection Between Vagal Tone and Dysregulation:
Building a Legacy Together: 6 Ways to Create Shared Meaning in Your Relationship
5 November 2024 /
Building a Legacy Together: 6 Ways to Create Shared Meaning in Your Relationship
Creating shared meaning and a legacy in your relationship and family life is an intentional process that strengthens bonds and builds a foundation for the future. Creating shared meaning involves cultivating a deep sense of connection and purpose that both partners value. This not only strengthens the bond but also enhances the sense of fulfilment within the relationship and family. It requires intentionally fostering values, traditions, and a vision for the future that unite everyone and contribute to a strong family identity—a sense of "we are in this together."
Here are six effective ways to create shared meaning in your relationship:
The Dynamics of Small Betrayals in Relationships - By Advanced Gottman Clinical Trainer & Consultant Trish Purnell-Webb
8 October 2024 / Relationship Help
Betrayal is a powerful word that often conjures up images of dramatic, earth-shattering events, like being caught red-handed in a compromising position with your partner’s best friend; or finding the receipt for jewellery that’s been sent to another in your partner’s coat pocket, or arriving home unexpectedly and finding your partner entertaining someone else in your bed. All these stories and more have found their way into my therapy room and yours too I bet.
However, the truth is that betrayal can also come in smaller, more subtle forms, and these small betrayals can significantly impact relationships even more than the bigger ones. While they may not make the evening news or lead to immediate breakups, the effects of these small betrayals can erode trust, eat away intimacy, and pulverize connection over time.
Relationship Repair Interventions - By Advanced Gottman Clinical Trainer & Consultant John Flanagan (Article 3 / 3)
9 September 2024 / For therapists
My hope is this series of articles supports therapists in a very practical sense by sharpening assessment formulation, conceptualising couple repair through the repair continuum lens and finally exploring intervention to aid couples deepen repair and healing.
This third and final article, details the essential principles that guide comprehensive relationship repair along with the interventions identified in the Relationship Repair Continuum (refer to article 2 in this series) that are used to create healing in relationship injuries and ruptures. Specific attention is given to exploring both Restorative Dialogue and the trigger management support of TARR
Relationship repair is not just about saying sorry or forgiving the other, effective repair is fluid and contextual to the injury, from minor missteps in communication to major breaches of trust. Assisting couples to repair requires the therapist to be guided by repair principles that ensure the possibility of a comprehensive healing of the relationship rapture. The essential repair principles are as follows:
Couples and Addiction: the hidden reality. By Campbell MacBean Psychologist, Clinical Supervisor, CGT & Clinical Level 1 Trainer
19 August 2024 / For therapists
Seems like we live in an age where addictive behaviour is more pervasive than ever before. Wikipedia defines addiction as a neuropsychological disorder characterised by an intense urge to use a drug or engage in a behaviour that produces a natural reward despite substantial harm and other negative consequences. In times past, substance abuse (alcohol, amphetamines, opioids) were in the majority. But currently, behavioural addictions, such as gambling, also include things like shopping, social-media and video game addiction.
Addiction is nothing new of course, it’s been around since time immemorial, and huge advances in addiction sciences means it is now understood as a disease that changes our brain’s wiring. What hasn’t caught up with these developments, however, is the tendency for many of us to see addiction as a choice or a failing of the person’s character.